tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2416089578031996468.post8241736617097328862..comments2023-11-09T07:13:39.461+10:30Comments on Musings: The Meaning of Marriage (Part 3 of 3)Wendyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11235980969755979085noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2416089578031996468.post-31954497369353046772012-02-01T20:37:19.054+10:302012-02-01T20:37:19.054+10:30Thanks Wendy! I'm looking forward to reading i...Thanks Wendy! I'm looking forward to reading it.Tamiehttp://arthurandtamie.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2416089578031996468.post-53708407555054883792012-02-01T20:14:58.677+10:302012-02-01T20:14:58.677+10:30Having just re-read the chapter Tamie, I think he ...Having just re-read the chapter Tamie, I think he is suggesting the principle of friendship as central to marriage transcends culture. It transcends ancient (& some current cultures) which suggest marriage is a transaction for economic or social status, and it transcends current western ideas of marriage which suggest that marriage will bring you emotional and sexual satisfaction. Instead, the goal is a marriage where each party seeks the increasing holiness of the other. He seems to be trying to make it as cross-cultural as possible.<br /><br />I think the teaching could definitely be applied more broadly – and it should be, the value of marriage and each marriage partner is something worth teaching about. But I wonder if there are different bridges to cross to explain it? Perhaps the barrier in a ‘transaction’ type marriage is convincing the man his wife could have that role, or that his wife is that important for him to fulfil that role, or perhaps convincing the wife she is of value. Perhaps in the more western marriage, the barrier is convincing the woman that satisfying romance and the man that satisfying sex are not all the marriage is about. Yes I know – highly generalised comments, but hopefully you get my point. <br /><br />His comments on friendship I think can be easily applied to other friendships, and should be – especially close single-gender friendships. I guess what he is saying is that having that close relationship with your spouse means the marriage works on a much better level.<br /><br />I really liked the friendship idea in this book, it’s one of the things that has stuck with me. <br /><br />Thanks,<br />WWendyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11235980969755979085noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2416089578031996468.post-50070581174707012992012-02-01T08:17:10.919+10:302012-02-01T08:17:10.919+10:30Hi Wendy
I've been hearing lots of talk (and ...Hi Wendy<br /><br />I've been hearing lots of talk (and people quoting from it on FB) about this book but am yet to read it.<br /><br />Keller's introduction of friendship language into a definition of marriage sounds attractive and sensible to me. However, I've been wondering how cross-culturally applicable you think it is?<br /><br />I understand Keller critiques Western romantic ideals of marriage but I was wondering about how this friendship idea might work in a culture where marriage is a more pragmatic arrangement e.g. where the husband still cares for, provides for his wife, etc and she still respects him, but where their primary emotional needs are met in single-gender contexts.)<br /><br />Do you think his teaching here is limited to Western marriages or is more general and could be applied more broadly?Tamiehttp://arthurandtamie.comnoreply@blogger.com