Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Marriage books

As well as parenting books, I read a lot of marriage books. Most of these are written from a Christian perspective, but not all. Partly this is because I think we can always work on improving our marriages, but also because part of my husband's job includes preparing people for marriage, so I like to keep up-to-date with the books that are available. I have a pile of books for engaged couples that I still need to read, will include them once I have done so.

I am not going to write detailed reviews for other books, until I re-read them I think - it's been too long. All of the preparing for marriage books we read are at least over 10 years old.

Love and Respect, Dr Emerson Eggerichs. This is the best book on marriage I have read for ages. It is helpful, honest, realistic and biblically based. For a more detailed review see here.

The Seven Principles of Making Marriage Work, John Gottman. This secular book on marriage outlines what Gottman thinks are the key problems in marriages today and provides a framework for couples to work through them. It has a lot of good advice and principles, but also provided hundreds of activities including questionnaires to do with your spouse. If you are both willing to work on your marriage, these tools could be very helpful. However, if you are reading it on your own, or have a spouse who is unwilling to be involved, the value would be much less. We have tried some of the activities, and got quite a bit out of them, however, it did feel a little forced at times. Having said that, I think for couples who are pro-active about working on their marriages, there is a lot in this book that would be helpful.

Please note this post has been updated on another page - go here to see it.

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