Grief just is

Following on from yesterday's reference to Sarie's blog, there is another great article there by Narelle Jarrett on the grief of singleness. Here is an extract:

Grief demands to be recognized and allowed to be what it is - an uncontrollable emotional response - sadness - in the experience of a great loss.

No one chooses grief - it just is.
It sweeps across us unexpectedly, it catches us by surprise and it refuses to disappear just because we want it to.

It demands acknowledgement, it demands that we pay attention. That is why it is so cruel when we are called to 'trust God and get on with serving'.... In most instances we are in fact already doing just that...

Because the griefs of singleness and of not having children are so deep, so real and so totally right, they can't be dismissed or dealt with by anything other than allowing ourselves to grieve. Grieving with the friends who understand and who don't imply we are being self centred or self-pitying or even that we're doubting God's goodness. Such hurtful and totally inappropriate, even cruel responses to women and men in grief, do not help. In fact they add to the isolation and loneliness of grief.

It's a good, honest article, which many of us would benefit from. Read the whole post here.