No Ordinary View

Book Review: No Ordinary View, by Naomi Reed

About a year ago I read and reviewed My Seventh Monsoon, by Naomi Reed. I came back to it a few months ago because I was working through Ecclesiastes and recalled that she had structured her book around the seasons of life, just like the writer of Ecclesiastes does in chapter 3. I enjoyed reading it again just as much as the first time.

It has been my plan this year to also read her follow-up book, No Ordinary View. Partly because I loved the first book and wanted to see what happened, but also because she is one of the speakers at next year’s CMS-SA Summer Encounter and I wanted to read it before I heard her speak.

This book retells the three years she and her family spent in Nepal, serving as cross-cultural workers training native physiotherapists. Her husband did most of the training, and she primarily home-schooled their 3 boys. All of this took place in a country suffering civil war, poverty and monsoons of continuous rain lasting for months.

She has a real gift for recounting events in a way that is both interesting and engaging, and then reflecting and seeing what she learnt about God in that time, what He taught her and how she grew.

In the middle of their term, she found herself becoming increasingly dissatisfied with things, including the requirements of home schooling – she found herself desiring patience:

As I fixed my eyes on the horizon, I was aware of only one thought. “You can desire it. You can ask for it. You can break down and cry out load. But that’s not how you get patience. The only way to grow in patience is to walk a path where patience is required. It comes when it’s practiced.” There were no easy answers. There were no easy solutions. I breathed in deeply and returned to the stage where I would learn it. (p84)

I found her honesty refreshing. While my challenges in life are far less, I return to this thought often as I parent and I reflect on the patience required in such a role. It’s been very helpful.

The civil war came very close to them at times, requiring evacuation from their home. This taught her that she had come to treat her home as a place of refuge rather than God:

And then as I sat there that morning, I realised that in most part, I had put my confidence in almost everything but the Almighty God. I hadn’t normally admitted to it, I had just done it very quietly. I had put my confidence in my home, my husband, my profession, my own ability to problem solve. But mostly, I had put my confidence in my home. I had though that my home was my refuge. I had thought that the walls could keep out the enemy and provide us with a place of safety. I thought that I could be confident as long as I was within my home. [then they evacuated] … I realised that it was the first time that God alone was my refuge. My home had become as unsafe place to be, but in losing my home, I had found refuge in God. And I realised in that moment, I exchanged the theoretical understanding of his presence to the comfort of the tangible. (p119)

They also climbed some of Everest, which again made her think about her spiritual journey:

As I stared out at the physical path ahead, the parallels with my spiritual journey spoke to me. If in my walk with God I have a destination, then right now today, I’m further along the road that I was yesterday… As I sat facing the tallest mountain in the world and thinking about the route to its summit, I was reminded that the route I walk with God is also a path, a path with both a beginning and a destination. And the destination is important. It’s the only answer that counts. Heaven. (p131)

It’s a great read, very interesting and at times quite exciting. But, as I said, it’s her reflections of the events of their lives that really got me thinking. Well worth a read.

Calvin - Chapter 8

Chapter 8: So far as human reason goes, sufficiently firm proofs are at hand to establish the credibility of scripture*

Calvin starts by saying scripture is superior to all human wisdom. When we read it, we cannot help be swept away by what it is saying – not the eloquence or the writing, but rather its grand and sweeping content – God. No other writings can affect us in the way the bible does:

so deeply will is affect you, so penetrate your hearts, so fix itself in your very marrow, that … it is easy to see that the Sacred Scriptures, which so far surpass all gifts and graces of human endeavour, breathe something divine (Ch 8, pt 1, p 82).

Do you ever feel that when you have spent time in the bible? God’s word is overwhelmingly powerful.

Calvin goes on to deal with some common objections to the credibility of scripture, starting with numerous examples from the OT. He then covers the NT, the witness of the church and the martyrs willing to die for the doctrines of scripture. See Cathy’s post for some of the details here, I like her summary. In the end, the conclusion he made in chapter 7 remains – only the work of the Holy Spirit within us can convince us that scripture is the word of God.

Scripture will ultimately suffice for a saving knowledge of God when its certainty is founded upon the inward persuasion of the Holy Spirit … those who wish to prove to unbelievers that Scripture is the Word of God are acting foolishly, for only by faith can this be known. (Ch 8, pt 13, p92)

Upon reflection, I have found this argument more comforting than I did in Chapter 7. The Holy Spirit must convict people that the bible is God’s word. I cannot do it by powers of persuasion or reason. God alone works that change. Perhaps we should be praying more that God changes people’s hearts, rather than praying that we have the right words to say to them.




(* this is a very delayed post, we were supposed to cover ch 8 in May, then June for the slackers…! I will do posts on ch 9 & 10 in the next few weeks too – then I’ll feel more up to date!)

Raising kids with God at the centre - intro

Before we kick off with the ways we want to raise our children with God at the centre, let’s take a moment to remind ourselves of some key things:

1. God is in control

God is fully, completely sovereign. He provides what our children need and he takes care of them.

God alone is the one who will act in our children’s hearts to lead them to a saving faith. As parents we want to be faithful in teaching our children about God, his world and his word. However, in the end God will work in their lives and they will respond to him, or not.

For those of us who are at more of the ‘control’ end of the spectrum, this can terrify us, because we would love to be able to guarantee the faith of our children by the amount we teach them. However, in reality this is freeing, because we can rest in the fact that God is in control, and our children’s response to God is ultimately between them and God, and not up to us (however scary that may be).


2. God loves our children more than we do

Really! He cares about them more than we do and he grieves more than we do when they turn astray. This helps us to trust God – he knows what he is doing, even though we may not be able to see how.


3. We (as parents) are not alone

As parents we are the main teachers and role models for our children, but we cannot do it all nor are we expected to. We are part of a community – be it extended family, church and/or friends. Our children will (hopefully) also learn the things of God at church, at some schools, from some family & friends.

For those of us who are godparents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, we form a team with parents to help them raise children as part of a community.


4. It’s never too late to start

Don’t feel like you have missed out and it’s too late to teach your children about Jesus, it’s not. You can start today teaching your children the things of God.


5. Our families are unique

Think about your family when you teach them about God. We are a ‘book’ family – we love reading. So, we make sure we have lots of good books to read which teach our children about God.

Your family might be different. You might love the outdoors, and you use that to teach about God’s amazing creation. You might be musical or artistic and you can use that to start teaching children about the creativity that God gives to people.

Don’t get caught in the trap of thinking "we aren’t like them, so we can’t do that". When you read Noel Piper’s Treasuring God in Our Traditions, you find out that John Piper writes poems to each of his children for their birthdays. I could read that and think "we would never do that, my husband would never do that – we’re not like them, it’s all too hard". Do what works for your family.

The circumstances of our families will also mean that children learn things at different times. For example, in a family where someone is very sick, children may well learn to be caring and compassionate quicker than another family. A family who earn a lot of money may well need to focus on service and generosity sooner. Obviously, we want to eventually teach about all of these things, but the way we do it may change with circumstance.



In all of these things, we need to remember to trust God. He is in control of all things and he loves our children, in whatever circumstance they are in. Therefore, we need to remember to pray to him about the children in our lives.


***

The next three posts will outline the 3 goals that I suggest we want for our children, and they will be the way we plan to keep God at the centre of our families.

The goals are that our children:

1. Grow up in the knowledge and love of God as their heavenly Father, & Jesus Christ as their Lord and Saviour
2. Mature in godliness; including character, speech & attitude
3. Develop a life-time habit of bible reading, prayer and church attendance

Next post: # 1 – Growing up in the knowledge and love of God as their heavenly Father, & Jesus Christ as their Lord and Saviour

Raising kids with God at the centre

Raising kids with God at the centre - new series

I did a seminar a few months ago, titled Raising kids with God at the centre. I have now turned it into a blog series. There are 6 posts, which will be posted over the coming weeks.

It was designed both for parents of young children (babies to primary school) and others involved in the lives of young children (grandparents, godparents, and aunts/uncles). Actually, it was at a women’s conference, so I angled it at mothers, grandmothers, godmothers and aunts. But it’s applicable to both men and women!

Stay tuned...

Only one child at home

Change #3

To be honest, this is the change that I am most apprehensive about. Now that Mr 7 and Miss 5, I have only Miss 2 at home.

I find the pre-schooling years very hard work, enjoyable they are - but also tough. My suspicion has often been that the school years will be ones we really enjoy and so far with Mr 7 that has proven to be the case. It’s probably not ‘school’ so much, but the added development, maturity and thought that a child over 5 has, compared with the under 5s.

Miss 2 has had playmate siblings at home since she was born, and she will especially miss Miss 5 now that she has gone to school. That means I am now the playmate. I wish I could say that it fills me with joy, but it doesn’t really – I have always struggled with pre-schooler play: the pretending, the dress ups, playdough, painting, etc.

So, here are my thoughts about the next few years:

• My main prayer points for myself will be for patience and contentment, knowing that these will the areas I will be tested in.

• We have decided not to ‘overschedule’ our time. It is very tempting to enrol in dance, kindergym and swimming classes so that we don’t have to fill in so much free time together. However, that is not beneficial for Miss 2 (I think) and definitely not necessary. We might do one activity like this together, but not yet. Realistically, with bible study, mothers group and other things, the week can actually fill up quite fast.

• I want to use some of our time to catch up with friends. Coincidentally, I have a lot of friends that will also soon have only 1 or 2 children at home (who are close to the same age as Miss 2), and other friends whose eldest or only child is the same age as her. I hope to use that time to strengthen those friendships for her, and also me with their mums.

• I discovered some time ago that you do not have to be a mum who loves everything. Having realised that playing with playdough drives me nuts, I no longer make it. Having realised painting creates a lot of stress, I don’t get it out. In our house you “play with playdough at crèche and you paint at kindy”. It’s OK not to do everything.

• We will continue to have ‘rest time’. 1 hour of ABC2 or DVD time after lunch, rest time for Miss 2 and rest time for me. We will also continue to have ‘daycare day’, otherwise known as ‘Mummy’s mental health day’.

• One wise friend told me to turn these few years into a more indulgent time. Take them out for lunch. Go have a coffee. Go on a bus trip. Do fun things together that you didn't do (due to money or ease) with more kids at home.

• I will keep reminding myself how much easier things are with one child. One child who doesn’t need a day sleep. One child who can walk everywhere. One child who doesn’t need a pram. One child who can climb in and out of her own carseat. One child who can feed herself. One child who can talk and tell me she is hungry, thirsty or tired.

So, this is what have I decided:

We will have fun together. We will go to the zoo. We will go to the park. We will play with friends. We will play together. We will do craft (when I can handle it!). We will talk about things just the two of us. We will do some little bible studies aimed at her level, not the level of her older siblings. We will read books together. And we will have fun Mummy & Miss time, because we will never get the time back again.

Running

Change #2

Over the last 6 months I have started running. For those that have not known me for long, this may not seem like a big deal, but some of you out there know that it really is. I used to hate running.

Yet I have continued to search for exercise options. The gym is less and less appealing because of the effort to get there and the volume of the music. The pool is only open 6 months of the year. However, the river and the tracks along it are there all year round – quiet and free.

I started walking almost every day about 9 months ago, to deal with some ongoing health and pain issues. As we moved into summer, the walking was boring me a little, so I started running occasionally. The running has steadily increased and now I am running.

I’m not sure I would go so far as to say I am now a “runner”, but I am definitely “running”. I regularly run 4km, but have managed to stretch it out to 6.5km on a good day. The aim is to go 3-4 times a week.

Some things I have discovered are:

• I am really enjoying it. Surprise of all surprises!

• I run much better before lunch or mid-afternoon. I do not even try to go early morning, I want my sleep and at the moment it’s too cold. Therefore, some careful management of when Husband can be home to mind the kids is required.

• Husband will do almost anything to enable me to do exercise – he knows how good it is for me, both physically and mentally and he will make it happen. Reminds me of this chapter in for women only.

• I need to keep listening to new things. A song playlist bores me after a while – although does provide some good beats at times to keep you going! I am now choosing to listen to audiobooks or sermons. My mind has to focus on something other than the running.

• I can now do something I previously thought was impossible (ie. run for 30-45 mins non-stop). Helps to give the self-confidence a boost at times!

• I need to stop expecting dramatic body shape changes as a result – nothing appears to have changed at all. However, my pain issues are decreased, which is much more important.

• I need motivation. I have a friend in Sydney who has started running, and another friend here who regularly runs >10kms - she confided that she only started running when she was 35. I kept thinking that they could do it, and so could I – and it’s true, I can! So, if you need motivation also, feel free to use me, think to yourself: “Wendy managed it, I can too”

• I have a little goal: to run in a fun run (6kms) in a few months. My friend from Sydney may well join me and that would be great fun to do it together. Even if it doesn’t work out, I know now that I could do it.

Another child at school

Change #1

My daughter, Miss 5, started school yesterday. Now I find myself with more children at school than children at home. She has been very excited, so I am not suspecting it will be a dramatic adjustment for her, but it’s going to take some getting used to for me.

We said goodbye to her ‘minis’ carers on the last Tuesday of last term – this is the program for pre-schoolers at the ladies bible study group I attend. It was a poignant moment for me as I explained to her that she has been coming with me to that group for her entire life, first in a pram and sitting with me as a little baby, moving into crèche at 6 months, then onto minis at age 3. She has always loved it and always been happy to go. She is our first child born in Adelaide, so it feels somehow more significant that these things she has been doing with me for her whole 5 years are now finished.

It will also take a more concerted effort this term to settle her into school. I never needed to be very involved with any of Mr 7’s reading or spelling as he grasped it all very quickly. I suspect Miss 5 will not be quite the same, so there will be more of an adjustment as I need to listen to readers, help with spelling practice, etc.

I am also recalling just how tired Mr 7 was in the first few terms of him starting school, so I am preparing myself for that – and the need to have very quiet afternoons and weekends until we get into the swing of it all again.

Hard to imagine I am now the mum of 2 school kids!

One-to-one: Resources (Ch 8), Appendices and Conclusions

This series was originally posted on In Tandem, a blog for ministry wives

One-to-one: A Discipleship HandbookResources (Ch 8), Appendices and Conclusions

The final chapter of the book is a resource list, including bible study resources & books to read on various topics. She also includes a number of sample bible studies for both believers and unbelievers.

There are 2 appendices: one on personal quiet times and the other on how to structure a course to train people for for one-to-one ministry.

All of these are very helpful, and if you are convinced that this is a book worth reading (like I am) you will already have gotten hold of it and therefore have the resources in front of you!

As we draw this book series to a close - let me encourage you to consider your one-to-one ministry:

• How might you, in the life stage you are currently in, become involved in meeting with someone one-to-one?

• If you already do meet with someone, has this book encouraged you and challenged you to ensure you are reading the bible together, praying together and sharing your lives with each other?

Perhaps you have been encouraged as I have and you also have these words from Hebrews ringing in your ears:

Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching. (Hebrews 10:23-25)

One-to-one: Chapter 7

This series was originally posted on In Tandem, a blog for ministry wives

One-to-one: A Discipleship Handbook
Chapter 7 - Other considerations

De Witt now begins to draw things to a close with some final things to consider in one-to-one work.

1. Accountability - as one-to-one work is by nature private, it is important to ensure you have accountability measures in place, in light of the risks mentioned in chapter 2 (intensity, control, legalism, etc) but also that you are not teaching heresy, being legalistic, that you are remaining prayerful, that you are giving appropriate advice and that you are not being drained by the relationship.

This can be achieved a number of ways, the most common of which is with a prayer partner(s). She also suggests that someone in the leadership of your church or group knows that you are catching up with someone in that fellowship.

I found this a helpful point. I suspect, as ministry wives, that we do not always ensure these types of accountability measures are in place. Whether it is to a trusted prayer partner, or even our husband (as the leader of the gathering), it is important to establish a structure where we can be accountable for our one-to-one relationships.
 Have any of you done this and how has it worked?

2. Pastoral Issues
Confidentiality - we want to be an entirely trustworthy confidante for our one-to-one partner. At the same time we want to be careful about promising entire confidentiality. There are some circumstances which we are required to report by law. Also, it is unwise to agree to complete confidentiality when major issues arise, such as major psychological problems, issues of physical or sexual abuse, self-harm, etc. We are unlikely to be equipped to deal with such scenarios and emotionally we will need support in order to support our one-to-one partner.

God's sovereignty and our responsibility

We must always remember the truth of God's loving sovereignty and ultimate responsibility to take care of his children. Knowing this will give us more confidence to keep persevering with someone who is sharing some distressing personal struggles, without that sense of panic at our total inexperience of helplessness. (p149)

De Witt goes on to give some helpful pointers for when to recommend someone see a professional counsellor, such as a problem persisting for several months, they are very depressed, suicidal or have a persistent sleep problem. Even if someone does require professional help, they will still benefit from their time with you - as you continue to look at biblical and spiritual truths together.


3. Moving on

This should be an exciting time as we see our one-to-one partner move to to live the Christian life more effectively as they are more rooted and established in Christ. (p155)

However, it can also be tricky as people can end up feeling rejected. It is a time which can require care. We will want to make sure they are in other Christian relationships which will help them persevere in their faith (eg home groups, prayer partners, etc)

Similarly, it can be hard for us to 'let them go'. It is tempting to enjoy being looked up to and depended on for guidance. In the end though, we want them to grow in their dependence on God.


Things to think about:

• Do you have an accountability group or partner? Do you need to find one?
• Can you identify when someone needs professional help?
• Are you able to 'let go' of your one-to-one partners, encouraging them to continue to depend on God for their spiritual growth and maturity?

Next Week: Resources (Ch 8), Appendices and Conclusions

One-to-one: Chapter 6

This series was originally posted on In Tandem, a blog for ministry wives

One-to-one: A Discipleship Handbook
Chapter 6 - Making Conversations Count

Having dealt more than adequately with how we should prepare to read the bible with someone and what our time together could look like, De Witt now turns her attention to the conversations we have with them. She looks at 5 types of conversations we may have.

1. Gospel conversation:

It is probably fair to say that these times of 'quality catch-up' are the lifeblood of a well-functioning church, where individual members are taking seriously the command to 'love one another' by taking time out for other members of the church family ... We should never underestimate the needs in an average church for encouraging and supportive input, however outwardly confident people seem. (p130)

To have helpful conversations we need to be able to ask questions sensitively, and respond appropriately ensuring we have been listening.

2. Encouragement - for those who are struggling with circumstances, encouragement and comfort may be what we provide.

3. Sometimes it will be appropriate to rebuke someone and a tactfully given gentle word would be the first step that we would undertake. For those who are already aware of their sin or error, rebuke may not be necessary, but rather a pointing to the extent of God's grace.

4. Correction can be required when we encounter false doctrine. The basis for any such correction must always be the bible, and as such we must ensure we are also growing in our knowledge and understanding of God's word.

5. Finally, there may be times where we may need to challenge someone, perhaps to consider more involvement in a ministry area.

Then, she goes on to list some passages that are useful for specific issues, including depression, fear, forgiveness, guidance, and worry.


Things to think about*:

• Would someone listening in on your conversations with others think they were conversations that counted for eternity?
• If you already meet one-to-one with someone, what type of conversation do you think they need at the moment?
• Which type of conversation should someone be having with you?

(* These are all adapted from the study questions in the book)


Next Week: Chapter 7 - Other considerations

One-to-one: Chapter 5

This series was originally posted on In Tandem, a blog for ministry wives

One-to-one: A Discipleship Handbook
Chapter 5 - Meeting Regularly to Study the Bible: When You Meet

There is a lot of useful practical material in this chapter, so I will just give you some of the headings and summarise a few points along the way.

1. The practicalities - where to meet (usually a quiet place, but if you have nowhere quiet - meet wherever you can), how long to meet for (women usually meet for longer than men), make sure the bible study time doesn’t keep getting eroded by chatting time.

2. Leading the bible study

• set the right tone - relaxed and informal
• respond to answers - wait for the person to think and respond, don’t jump in
• encourage them to use their bible, looking it up to see the answer
• be wise when dealing with ‘red herrings’ - issues that are off topic - sometimes they need to be answered straight away, sometimes they don’t
• pray together - help draw ideas together at the end, sharing prayer points, helping encourage people to pray

You can also consider whether to ask your one-to-one partner to do some preparation before the next study. Often people can find some time in the week, and many will willingly do some extra reading in advance.

There are also couple of helpful pages by Rico Tice which cover his advice on meeting one-to-one with non-Christians.

3. Other issues to address - she suggests that over the course of a year or so, it’s good to also cover some key doctrines and certain lifestyle issues that may not come up in passages you are studying. This helps us to be grounded in our faith and to live it out more thoroughly. Some of these may be:

• doctrine - assurance, predestination, Jesus’ return, the Holy Spirit, biblical manhood and womanhood, prayer, the church, etc.
• lifestyle issues - evangelism, sex & relationships, family, money, career, prayer life, etc. She also covers some helpful pointers when covering ‘issues’ - how we need to be willing to let people fail, to support them, to speak to truth in love & to watch our motives.

4. Training - one-to-one ministry is a great way to train people in handling the bible themselves, personal evangelism, in one-to-one ministry & in training bible teachers.


Some things to think about:

• If you meet with someone one-to-one - do you tend towards studying bible passages or doctrine/issues? Do you need to change the focus a little?
• If you don’t meet with someone one-to-one - why not draft a bible study for a one-to-one meeting and ask a friend or mentor if you can lead it for the two of you? If you are scared of meeting with someone one-to-one this may be a helpful first step.

Next week: Chapter 6 - Making Conversations Count

One-to-one: Chapter 4

This series was originally posted on In Tandem, a blog for ministry wives

One-to-one: A Discipleship Handbook
Chapter 4 - Meeting Regularly to Study the Bible: Before You Meet

De Witt starts the chapter covering some basic practical matters:

• how you ask someone to meet with you
• how their spouse may feel about it (if they are married)
• how often to meet (weekly or fortnightly)
• how long to meet for (maybe 6 months to start and then re-assess)
• what to study (eg. book of the bible, a Christian theme using various bible passages, or a Christian book on a bible theme)

She makes the point that studying the bible directly (without a guide) should be the norm. If we look at themes, we can inadvertently turn towards our hobby horses rather than searching the Scriptures. Similarly, looking a Christian book should be done so that it can turn you back to the bible.

I must say I found this point helpful to think through. I meet in a triplet of wives to support each other, and we have gone through a book last year and this year. This challenged me that our next thing, and perhaps our priority from now on, should be looking at the bible together.

The rest of the chapter covers how to actually prepare a bible study that you would do with someone when you meet one-to-one. She starts from the beginning, assuming no real knowledge of how to prepare a study - this is very helpful. There is no way we could accuse her of encouraging us to read the bible one-to-one with someone, but not providing us with the tools to do so.

Her suggestion is that for a non-Christian, you should start with Mark’s gospel. This is what my husband has been doing for years when he meets up with non-Christians on uni campuses. It’s what I have started to do this year also. Both he and I can testify to how much we learn each time we do it, let alone how exciting it is to read it with someone else.

She also gives suggestions for after that, perhaps Colossians or 1 Peter, and the outline of a brief ‘course’ of foundation of faith. A lot of these ideas are expanded in Chapter 8 (Resources) where she has provided some sample bible studies.

Then she deals with the details of writing a bible study - trying to get understand the overall point of the passage, observation (what the passage says), interpretation (what the passage means), application (what the passage means to me) and then putting all this into a bible study format (questions).

It was at this point that I thought this book would also be of great benefit to bible study group leaders. In fact, I wonder if the best form of training for potential bible study group leaders is to ask that they start a bible study with one person - a one-to-one relationship.


To think about:

• If you already meet with someone one-to-one, do you think you put enough emphasis on bible study - both as the focus of what you do together, and with the amount of time you give to preparation before the meeting?

The Mom Song (by Go Fish)

I found this via the girltalk website - a great, fun song about Mums (or Moms!)

Calvin - Chapter 7

Chapter 7: Scripture must be confirmed by the witness of the spirit. Thus may it's authority be established as certain; and it is a wicked falsehood that its credibility depends on the judgment of the church

(now that's a mouthful!)

Calvin now starts to address some of the problems of his time with regard to the view of Scripture and its authority - namely whether scripture can stand alone or it needs to be authorised by the church.

He affirms that:

the Scriptures obtain full authority among believers only when men regard them as having sprung from heaven, as if there the living words of God were heard. (Ch 7, pt 1, p74)

He then addresses the false assertion that the church has to approve the scriptures and rather shows that the church itself is grounded in scripture. This includes a discussion of Augustine and his views on the matter, in which Calvin claims Augustine has been misrepresented. I'll leave the details of that to the keener readers!

In the end, says Calvin, it is the Holy Spirit which convinces us of the authority of scripture.

the testimony of the Spirit is more excellent that all reason. For as God alone is a fit witness of himself in his Word, so also the Word will not find acceptance in men's hearts before it is sealed by the inward testimony of the Spirit. The same Spirit, therefore, who has spoken through the mouths of the prophets must penetrate into our hearts to persuade us that they faithfully proclaimed what had been divinely commanded. (Ch 7, pt 4, p79)

So, scripture is self-authenticated by it's author, who speaks to us through it and enables us to accept it. Do other Calvin Club readers think therefore: this is a fact that is of comfort to believers, that we can trust the words of God, because they are the words of God; but perhaps, a not entirely convincing argument for the unbeliever? What do you think?

Gospel-Centred Family

Book Review
Gospel-Centred Family: becoming the parents God wants you to be, Ed Moll and Tim Chester

I did a review on this book at church yesterday, so I thought I might as well include my thoughts here also!

***

I really liked this book. It’s not your standard parenting book which talks about how to raise well-rounded & well-behaved children. Rather, it takes us one-step further and challenges us to think about how being Christian changes our parenting, our goals for our children and our priorities as a family.

Here are 5 things I liked:

1. It challenges us as parents to think about how the gospel shapes our parenting. We should have gospel aims and gospel hopes. More than wanting our children to be being well-rounded, successful and competent, we should desire for our children to know God and serve him.

2. It addresses the need for discipline – but emphasises that parents need it as much as children do. It was helpful to be challenged where I might need more discipline as a parent – perhaps in patience or self-control, or not just wanting the kids to be well-behaved because I would like a quieter or easier life.

As well as dealing with discipline, it also strongly emphasises the need for grace as well.
- grace for parents which allows us to trust God in all things and let go of the guilt that we feel as parents when we fail (or think we have failed)
- & grace for children – that they know they are always loved and accepted by us (& God), no matter what they do, just like has God loved and accepted us through Jesus.

3. They remind us to enjoy our kids - making sure we consider them a gift. Give them time, play together, create fun memories together, do fun things on holidays, make things together, do hobbies together. It was a helpful reminder not to get so caught up in ‘parenting’ and ‘the busyness of life’ that we forget to actually enjoy them.

4. It encouraged me to consider how we make God’s word central in our family life. They say, “don’t underestimate the power of the word lived and the word loved” (p64). There are also helpful tips in here for managing what younger children watch on TV and how to teach older children to evaluate what they watch.

5. Finally, there was a whole section on being a family that is mission-centred. To be a family that serves and loves others, both those who are local and those who are far away. In of all this, children are learning to serve, and also that they are not the centre of the world.

Even with all of that, it’s still a small, short book. Each chapter is only about 5 pages, and is very easy to read. Each has a bible passage to think about, some pointers about how the bible instructs us on that matter and then some practical suggestions for how to do it.

With this easy format, you could read it on your own (like I did), you could read it as a couple and then discuss it; or you could even read it together as part of a bible study group or mother’s group.

It’s a great starting point for thinking about how your family are going with keeping the gospel and God’s word at the centre of your family.


***

Nicole has also been blogging about this book in a series of posts, you can look at them here.

One-to-one: Chapter 3

This series was originally posted on In Tandem, a blog for ministry wives

One-to-one: A Discipleship Handbook
Chapter 3 – What’s Involved

So, we have decided meeting one-to-one is a good thing to do. What then, should we do? De Witt believes meeting together should have 3 elements:

1. Prayer

As it is God’s work to bring people to new life in Christ it is also His work to continue that work until the last day.

we need to be crying out to God to be establishing and growing his children according to his good will. We must be utterly dependent on him to work his perfect will in people’s lives, rather than depending on our methods or commitment to change people in a lasting way. (p51)

2. Bible Study

The Bible is to be our main resource as we meet with people because it is God's true word and

it is God’s designated tool for one-to-one work:

• if we are meeting with unbelievers we should use the bible “unashamedly and extensively to prove that Jesus is Lord & explain God’s plan of salvation” (p61)
• 2 Tim 3:16 tells us that all scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness. If we use the bible, we can have the joy of seeing the people of God thoroughly equipped for every good work.

3. Friendship Sharing our lives with our one-to-one partner.

If our times of one-to-one bible study and prayer are to have the fullest possible impact on both of our lives, we need to share something of who we are, what commitments and relationships we have, how we use our time and money, and what struggles we are both facing. (p71)

It also means meeting practical needs to the extent that we are able. Do they need a meal, some help moving, and afternoon off from the kids? “It is costly in terms of time, emotional energy, vulnerability and sometimes finances. But is it very rewarding.” (p73)

De Witt knows that this will be hard for some of us to manage, she encourages prayer so that we can give of our lives to others.


Things to think about:

• Do you tend to emphasise one of these three elements in your one-to-one ministry?
• Do you tend to neglect one?
• Do find it hard to genuinely share your life with people to the extent suggested here?

Mad Dogs and Englishmen

Mad Dogs and Englishmen: An Expedition Round My Family, Ranulph Fiennes

An elderly friend recommended this to me so I duly went off to the library to get my hands on it. I don't read many histories, although one of the few areas of history that does interest me is English history, owing to Year 8 study of Tudor England and seeing the Bayeux tapestry in Bayeux in 2000.

Unbenowst to me before now, Ranulph Fiennes is a rather well-known explorer who has climbed Everest and reached both poles. I have to admit, I thought my friend was talking about Joseph Fiennes, the actor, when she recommended the book to me - turns out they are cousins. It was interesting later to note that the family home, Broughton Castle, occupied by the Fiennes for 21 generations, was the castle where Shakespeare in Love was filmed, starring the same Joseph Fiennes.

Ranulph uses his family history to recount the history of England, able to trace his direct ancestry to Charlemagne (~800 AD). His relatives were part of William the Conqueror's invasion of England in 1066 and others fought on the other side for Henry. One is immortalised in the Bayeux Tapestry giving advice to William. Amongst his other relatives he can include men who were at the signing of the Magna Carta, one who sat on the jury of Anne Boleyn's trial, and women who were direct ancestors of both King Henry VI and Richard III. One Celia Fiennes in the 17th C wrote of her explorations of England which resulted in the rhyme 'Ride a cockhorse to Banbury Cross to see a Fiennes [fine] lady upon a white horse'. It's amazing how involved various parts of his family were in the major points of British history.

It's a long book and it's a history that covers over 1000 years, so there is bound to be some dry patches in there (which there were) but overall it was very interesting. I really liked his writing style too. Here are a few excerpts for you:

Many English people today point to Norman ancestry and boast, 'My lot came here in 1066.' Quite why that should be a point of pride rather than of shame, when one considers how those same ancestors behaved, is questionable and, as I shall reveal, the Fienneses are as guilty as anyone. (p3)

He includes some choice details that I never recall being told at school:

The Bastard (William the Conqueror) was buried in Caen, so corpulent that when the attendant bishops tried to force his body into the royal sarcophagus, his entrails burst forth and the resulting pestilent stench caused panic amongst the mourners, many of whom fled the ceremony. (p19)

Tell me that detail would not make history more interesting for your average teenage boy!

Commenting on the long-term relationship between Britain and France, when an agreement was formed between the two nations in the early 1900s:

[it] put an end to a thousand years of intermittent warfare. It did not, of course, stop the two nations constantly sniping at each other because it is difficult to break an enjoyable habit.

It was sad to read at the end that Fiennes never met his father (he was conceived during the war, after which his father was killed in action):

A psychologist would probably say that my growing up without ever meeting my father or grandfather, nor having any brothers, uncles or male relatives, was bound to make me keen to trace my forbears.... You should give it a go, as you never know whose blood might run in your veins. It could be Genghis Khan, Florence Nightingale, or even Caligula. (p369)

I'm glad I read it.




Bayeux tapestry photo sourced from http://www.bayeuxtapestry.org.uk/bayeux30.htm

Calvin - Chapter 6

Chapter 6: Scripture is needed as guide and teacher for anyone who would come to God the Creator

Here we get to the point - we need Scripture to understand God. Creation alone or our minds alone are not enough - we do not read them properly. God alone gives us the truth through his word:

Scripture, gathering up the otherwise confused knowledge of God in our minds, having dispersed our dullness, clearly shows us the true God. (ch6, pt 1, p70)

God ensured that his word was recorded for all:

For by his Word, God rendered unambiguous forever, a faith that should be superior to all opinion. Finally, in order that truth might aide forever and survive through all ages, the same oracles he had given to the patriarchs it was his pleasure to have recorded, as it were, on public tablets. (ch6, pt 2, p71)

God's word is so important that:

no one can get even the slightest taste of right and sound doctrine unless he be a pupil of Scripture (ch6, pt 2, p71)

God's word is important - it is the only way we can truly know God. Does this make you want to savour God's word a little bit more?



(For May - chapters 7 & 8)

Godparents

Meredith at The Key to the Door has done a lovely little series on godparents - Hooray for Godparents.

Go across and have a look at her posts:

#1 - A bit of intro about promises that godparents make

#2 - Four Ways Godparents can Bless their Godchildren. She lists: pray, celebrate significant moments, remember birthdays, and be a mentor.

#3 - Four Ways Godchildren can Bless their Godparents: pray, remember birthdays & Christmas, share news & encourage gratitude

I found it really helpful as Husband & I are godparents to 6 children/young adults & our children have 6 godparents between them. It's always good to think about how to care for our own godchildren and to encourage our children to care for their godparents.

Thanks Meredith!

One-to-one: Chapter 2

This series was originally posted on In Tandem, a blog for ministry wives

One-to-one: A Discipleship Handbook
Chapter 2 – Getting Involved

De Witt starts the chapter dealing with some usual arguments why someone would not consider doing one-to-one ministry – such as feeling inferior or incompetent, it not being practical or it feeling unnatural.

However, I suspect for those of us who are ministry wives, while we certainly may not feel up to the task, we know that we have a position in which it is logical, easy and perhaps even expected that we might want to catch up with other Christian women to read the bible together. What a privilege! People may expect us to want to read the bible, be keen to do so with younger Christians and will feel like you are ‘doing’ your job if you ask people to read the bible with you. Instead of feeling overwhelmed or frustrated by such expectations, perhaps we could see it as an opportunity and grab it.

She goes on to list some qualifications for one-to-one ministry. The main one is to be a Christian holding firm to the gospel of Christ and seeking to live for God’s glory (p29). All of the following we can continue to grow in!:

• we must have a strong personal commitment to the Lord Jesus – we need to be moving forward in our relationship with God
• we will need to love – to pray, to be patient, etc
• we will need to have a working knowledge of the Bible – to understand God’s basic plan of salvation and how it unfolds, understand types of literature in the bible and how to approach them
• we will need to be honest and simple – honest about our lives and struggles (appropriately) and simple in our presentation of ideas
• we will need to be prepared to count the cost – it will take time and emotional energy

Well, who should we meet with? Someone who is willing to meet! But especially consider:

• non-Christians who are interested in matters of faith and finding out about Jesus
• new or young Christians – those recently converted
• those who will be able to teach others, who need some training or equipping

For those of us in ministry, chances are we know of more people who could benefit from one-to-one discipleship than we could possibly take on. However, as we are also often privy to confidential information, we may also have a bigger picture of the needs of many, and therefore (especially in consultation with our husbands) may find it easy to decide on one or two women to catch up with.


De Witt goes on to list some of the potential dangers of one-to-one work:

• intensity – unhealthy intensity can develop in a one-to-one relationship. Therefore it is recommended that only women mentor women (and likewise men, men). One should also be aware of the potential for same-sex attraction and how to deal with it. If that is a potential risk-area for you, you should strongly re-consider whether one-to-one work is workable for you.
• control - where the (usually) initiator holds too much authority over the ‘disciple’.
• legalism – concern for personal godliness can overflow intro a list of rules and regulations for the younger Christian.
• over-dependence – looking to the disciple for instruction & guidance, rather than God’s word
• pride – on behalf of the discipler, being looked up to and seen as a ‘guru’ can easily make us proud of ‘our achievements’ with the person.
• isolation – if those meeting together are not part of the church body

Things to think about:

• If you do not currently meet with someone one-to-one, are you in a position to consider doing so?
• What is holding you back? (both legitimate reasons and excuses!)
• Is there someone you know who you could consider meeting with?